David Abels - January 30th Memorial

Over the past month, my family has received so much support from the community and we have received letters from all over the world. My parents have read each of these letters line by line, and they appreciate them so much. There is one letter they have not read yet. I just received it yesterday. It from someone I like a lot, and Ben likes a lot. The letter is written to my parents and it reads as follows:

Dear Hope and Robert:

Hillary and I were saddened to learn of your son's death, and we extend our deepest sympathy. We hope that the love and support of your family and friends will sustain and comfort you during this difficult time. You are in our thoughts and prayers.

Sincerely,
Bill Clinton
Click here to view the letter

My brother Ben

He lived more in thirty-three years than most would live in a hundred.

Ben went away to college in 1989 and really did not come back home full time until after my son Emmett was born in May, 2003. We were all so happy that he was so close by again. He bought a house in Evanston , he went to work right here in Evanston .
Ben was coming to all the family events, birthdays and holidays. It felt good having him there. I got to spend a lot more time with him than usual for the past 18 months.

He taught me some very good things. My son Emmett, at some point he began to laugh & play. When Ben showed up, he would play with Emmett. And Emmett would laugh a little louder and smile a little wider than I had ever seen before. I learned from him, I copied him, and Emmett has been laughing harder ever since.

What I enjoyed the most was the time we spent together, just the two of us. Last year I did something I never did before. I bought a lot of baseball tickets. While Ben & I were very different brothers, one thing we had in common is we both loved to sit at Wrigley Field and catch a ballgame. We were not die hard fans, we could not name every player on the field, but since childhood we both loved to go to that ball park. We would sit for hours and talk about work, our friends, people we grew up with, Emmett, Heather, Grommett, my mom & dad, and whatever was going on in our lives. And while he could have afforded to do things differently, being Ben, he still insisted on taking the L train down to every game.

Ben loved to travel, but in a different way than most. He would really try to experience different cultures. He loved South America . If I went to a country in South America , I would stay at a fancy hotel. Ben would find a family and move in with them, and force himself to only speak Spanish. He would save up money at a good job, quite that same good job, and go travel for extended periods of time, until he would run out of money. I recently found out that Ben had plans to take a trip around the world, and spend a significant amount of time in India .

Ben loved the trip he took this last December, from the amazing skyline in Hong Kong to the beautiful beaches of Koh Phi Phi. Ben's last full day was in many ways a reflection of his life. He met a couple on their honeymoon from Buenos Aires . He went out in Loh Dalum Bay in the water with them and spoke Spanish for an hour. Ben loved Buenos Aires and loved speaking Spanish.
That night we know he thought about his family. He went gift shopping for a long time for his family and friends. So we know he was thinking about us.

On the morning of December 26th, he went sea kayaking which is something he loved to do. He went out to a remote beach and went swimming. He spent his last day in a place I know he would have loved, a beautiful remote Island , doing the things he loved to do.

If Ben were here, he would like to thank so many people. But most of all he would thank his good friend from Boulder, CO., who on a moments notice jumped on a plane to Thailand to go look for him.

He would thank the four Americans who did not know him and never met him before who stayed and searched for him in Thailand .

He would thank my mom and dad and my wife for being so brave and letting me go to look for him.

He would thank a girl from Chagrin Falls , Ohio , who while her own life was still at risk, tried her best to give us information to find Ben.

He would thank a private investigator, who in a few hours from now is going to wake up in Thailand and go look for my brother Ben all over again.

Finally, my brother would not ask this, so I will. Remember my brother Ben.